Years of Super Mario Bros., Super Mario World, Super Mario Bros. 3. Months and months of Super Mario Land (even though it’s Daisy in that Game Boy game). And hours of Super Mario 64 with 70 hard-earned stars. Then Peach rewards you with a tiny peck on the nose.

When she leaned forward I was like “it’s about damn time.” Mario and I have worked our lives trying to save her. If there was to be some kind of continuity between games and reward for years of dedication to Nintendo, Mario, and saving Peach, this was that moment – we had earned some goddamn appreciation. A peck on the nose doesn’t cut it.

But after all this time, and with Peach surrounded by mushrooms (which I assume reproduce a-sexually) things can’t be looking too good under that dress. Has ANYONE ever been under there? Only in fan-fiction friends. Only in fan fiction.