automaton and I rented Skyrim to see what the clamour was about. People talk about it like it’s the best thing you can have in your life right now. That might not be true of automaton and I’s lives, but we did have fun messing around.

Most of our fun came from being “smashy” when you really shouldn’t be. We smashed our guide all the way to that first town and he didn’t seem to mind. In town though, he wasn’t cool with it anymore. Nor was he pleased about hitting the other townspeople, or oddly, the chicken. In Zelda games I get it; chickens defend their own. But people laying down their lives to defend the honour of a dead chicken? More dead townsfolk is not what that chicken would have wanted.

We also messed with the line of sight. A wizard gave us a quest and when we talked to him immediately after he said, “I’m surprised to see you back so soon.” So we beat him to his knees, then ran away. When we got back he was fine and seemed to have forgotten the our beating. “I’m surprised to see you back so soon,” he said. A wizard knows better to forgive I guess.

And as the comic suggests, we swiped so many items that we were too heavy to run, and when we removed 20 items from our inventory they shat out all over the floor in hilarious fashion.

One of our mutual friends assured us the game gets amazing 20 hours in, like a TV show that only gets good in the second season. That’s a big investment. So for now I’m content to hear others stories.